So, I've finally revamped my blog again. This is more customized as I used one of my pictures as the background. Although am not sure it makes this space looks more comfortable, it's a huge leap for me to not hold on to the past as I've been telling myself for years to change the layout, update the pictures and delete obsolete links that no longer existed. But yet, there's this little tug in me that always say 'stop' when I was ready to click the 'save settings' button.
So a lil' pat on my back to finally de-clutter stuff that are no longer irrelevant to my world today. Bye bye past, and hello fresh blog!
It's amazing how it has been 10 years since I first blogged in this space. Am no where near being a successful blogger, nor do I have any consistent readers out there, it's a space that I am contented in sharing pieces of my mind with the world, with occasion new and old visitors.
If you are return visitor, my heart shouts a huge 'YOU ARE AWESOME' to you and giving you a virtual hug. And if you are a new visitor, welcome to my humble space and hope that you didn't feel that it's a waste of time stopping by.
A BIG Thank you for those who clocked the little number of views I have, it encourages me that it ain't zero most of the time and at least I know, at least, someone out there views this space.
It's funny how I looked back at my drafts and did not have the courage to publish even though this tiny space is so secluded from the world, and yet, I still can't foster that bit of strength to click 'publish' now. Haha... If you are reading this, at least this get published! 'YAY!'
Till my next post, my wish is that you will stay true to yourself even though it means letting go of your past (if it makes sense). Or rather, stay true to your current self, embrace who you are and do not let the past drag you on... (Oh wells, hope I made some sense there.)
Toodles!
♫ Somebody that I Used to Know - Covered by Walk off the Earth (They are such a cool band)
Monday, April 9, 2018
Tuesday, February 20, 2018
Grands
The feeling when you know your dream came true when you have this spotlight moment in the middle of a pretty mundane routine, staring at a picture you drew 2 years ago.
And what was that picture, a simple dream, which is to bring my grandma back home to stay with me.
I always thought it will be very very difficult to achieve, but somehow, at that very moment, I realized I've made it.
So, a couple of days ago was Chinese New year, and as years went by, people stopped having celebration at my grandma's place as she stopped cooking and started coming to mine. It became a routine that grandma only comes to our place for celebration and goes home, but somehow this year, we decided to tell her to stay with us a couple of nights before she goes back home. The normal her will protest and demand to go home, but on that very few days, she was like an angel, agreed to stay with us and the most wonderful news was that, she became my roommate.
Then I looked at the picture I drew 2 years ago which is hung in my room and I realized, that's it. This was what I visualized to happen and it did. God bless Mr. Goh's soul for doing that Law of Attraction workshop with us and it allowed me to draw what I really really wanted to happen. And it was Ron who pointed out that it does sound like faith in God as well, we believe that God will hear our prayers and deliver and it will happen. In a way, law of attraction is like faith, ain't it?
Although it may not be for as long as I wanted the stay to happen, it made my heart feel so full and warm. That feeling of bliss made me want it to be more permanent... Made me told myself that I can do it every day, as much work as it may be caring for an elderly.
It blew my mind that for 3 days I woke up seeing the little perks and mini conversations with grandma about where she is and whether I have eaten already and to talk about nonsense just to tease each other.
The forth day came and went, and it was time to bring grandma home. It was so surreal and hurtful, the reluctance of sending her home, the guilt of not being able to take as good care as she received the past few days is overwhelming.
As I watched the empty side of the bed, the tinge of sadness fell as you know that you won't feel as motivated to get up the next day having to hush her up as well.
It was a wonderful and pleasant few days and I will forever be thankful for the precious moments spent with my adorable grandma and I thank God for the innocence and the little talks that caught me off guard which makes the night a lil sweeter than it already is.
As I am typing this, will have to keep MY's granny in my prayers as her health seems to be going downhill. It's heart wrenching to hear about it, needless to say the nightmare MY is going through right now. May her granny find strength to recover. Same goes to WL's grandma who is struggling as well, may she recover soon.
On side note, nanay just told me they had grandparents day in her grandson's school. It's a brilliant brilliant idea, why haven't I thought about it? Fingers crossed it will be an upcoming project to happen soon. ^^
Do you have any grandparents story which makes your heart flutter?
And what was that picture, a simple dream, which is to bring my grandma back home to stay with me.
I always thought it will be very very difficult to achieve, but somehow, at that very moment, I realized I've made it.
So, a couple of days ago was Chinese New year, and as years went by, people stopped having celebration at my grandma's place as she stopped cooking and started coming to mine. It became a routine that grandma only comes to our place for celebration and goes home, but somehow this year, we decided to tell her to stay with us a couple of nights before she goes back home. The normal her will protest and demand to go home, but on that very few days, she was like an angel, agreed to stay with us and the most wonderful news was that, she became my roommate.
Then I looked at the picture I drew 2 years ago which is hung in my room and I realized, that's it. This was what I visualized to happen and it did. God bless Mr. Goh's soul for doing that Law of Attraction workshop with us and it allowed me to draw what I really really wanted to happen. And it was Ron who pointed out that it does sound like faith in God as well, we believe that God will hear our prayers and deliver and it will happen. In a way, law of attraction is like faith, ain't it?
Although it may not be for as long as I wanted the stay to happen, it made my heart feel so full and warm. That feeling of bliss made me want it to be more permanent... Made me told myself that I can do it every day, as much work as it may be caring for an elderly.
It blew my mind that for 3 days I woke up seeing the little perks and mini conversations with grandma about where she is and whether I have eaten already and to talk about nonsense just to tease each other.
The forth day came and went, and it was time to bring grandma home. It was so surreal and hurtful, the reluctance of sending her home, the guilt of not being able to take as good care as she received the past few days is overwhelming.
As I watched the empty side of the bed, the tinge of sadness fell as you know that you won't feel as motivated to get up the next day having to hush her up as well.
It was a wonderful and pleasant few days and I will forever be thankful for the precious moments spent with my adorable grandma and I thank God for the innocence and the little talks that caught me off guard which makes the night a lil sweeter than it already is.
As I am typing this, will have to keep MY's granny in my prayers as her health seems to be going downhill. It's heart wrenching to hear about it, needless to say the nightmare MY is going through right now. May her granny find strength to recover. Same goes to WL's grandma who is struggling as well, may she recover soon.
On side note, nanay just told me they had grandparents day in her grandson's school. It's a brilliant brilliant idea, why haven't I thought about it? Fingers crossed it will be an upcoming project to happen soon. ^^
Do you have any grandparents story which makes your heart flutter?
🎵Brave - Sara Bareilles (to the grandma and grandpas in the world who tell us innocent things, and for encouraging us to be brave in facing all adversities)
Thursday, January 25, 2018
Where Has the Time Gone?
It's just crazy how fast time flies.
One moment you were 12 dreaming about high school life, yearning to join the band,
next moment you are 17, joined the band and look forward to college life,
Fast forward, you finished college and is wondering where to go for your university life knowing exactly what you want to study,
And then you find yourself in a university you never thought that you will end up in and found this exact thing that you will give your life up to be a part of.
Before you realize, you are on a slightly famous stage, playing an instrument you never thought you would ever play.
And then you took your first trip to a country that you don't even know where it maps on the globe (needless to say imagine going) and for the first time, acknowledge what poverty really means, and how simple a happy life can be.
Soon after that, you found yourself your first ever job and had a blast within that short few months before heading to the land of freedom.
Next, you found yourself working in one of the most beautiful places in the world, working in the kitchen, where you found new love for making food chemistry.
You yearn to travel out of the tiny little village you stay in, all the hiking, hitchhiking, the animal sight hunting, there adventures, the thrill of walking in the wilderness, gasping about the possibility that you will encounter wildlife in a inappropriately close manner... The pitch dark nights decorated by millions of stars where you lie on the near zero temp ground, shivering the night away...
Just when you finally found your place on this foreign land, it's like you finally understood where you want to belong, with strangely friendly people, the peace found in the noisy city, the everywhere can be a dance floor lifestyle... And just when you felt that it was all just... right... you were hit by the fact that you have to go home... Home? You thought to yourself, felt strangely warm and weird, nothing feels right, but nothing feels wrong too...
When you start to realize that the beautiful dream has long gone and the harsh reality takes over your life, you landed up in a job you never dared to think about.. working with a child of differential needs.
It was a hard first couple of months, being screamed at, smacked, hair pulled, dealing with buckets of tears, but the outcome was so fulfilling, you thought for a moment that you could do this for a long long time.
Then the monstrous feeling of comfort sets in and you suddenly caught yourself getting bored of the mundane life you have, yearning for adventures once again, although you are literally going through adventures with the lil boy every single day.
Years went by, you decided that it's time to change... To change for the better, courageously gobbled down whatever pie life serves you, and woke up realizing, this isn't your kind of pie. More wasted time, more things to whine about, you learned that you do not work well with time aplenty.
You ferociously gobble down this pie, hoping that it will leave your life as soon as possible, looking forward to the new pie life has to offer, hoping it will feel better...
You waited and waited, hoping something wonderful will appear, and you noticed that piece of pie that has been lying around for quite some time and decided, maybe this is it, it has been around for some time, maybe it's time to take a bite, and at first bite, you feel it inside your bones that this is not the piece of pie you have been looking forward to. You thought to yourself, well, you have already taken a bite, it's your responsibility to finish it...
Until today you are still trying your best to finish that piece of pie, anticipating the next piece of pie, hoping that it's what you have been looking for...
Will you ever find it? Or will the monstrous comfort tie you down in this uncomfortable yet relaxing life? Who knows? Time flew faster than anyone can and along the way, time meets age, will you ever?
One moment you were 12 dreaming about high school life, yearning to join the band,
next moment you are 17, joined the band and look forward to college life,
Fast forward, you finished college and is wondering where to go for your university life knowing exactly what you want to study,
And then you find yourself in a university you never thought that you will end up in and found this exact thing that you will give your life up to be a part of.
Before you realize, you are on a slightly famous stage, playing an instrument you never thought you would ever play.
And then you took your first trip to a country that you don't even know where it maps on the globe (needless to say imagine going) and for the first time, acknowledge what poverty really means, and how simple a happy life can be.
Soon after that, you found yourself your first ever job and had a blast within that short few months before heading to the land of freedom.
Next, you found yourself working in one of the most beautiful places in the world, working in the kitchen, where you found new love for making food chemistry.
You yearn to travel out of the tiny little village you stay in, all the hiking, hitchhiking, the animal sight hunting, there adventures, the thrill of walking in the wilderness, gasping about the possibility that you will encounter wildlife in a inappropriately close manner... The pitch dark nights decorated by millions of stars where you lie on the near zero temp ground, shivering the night away...
Just when you finally found your place on this foreign land, it's like you finally understood where you want to belong, with strangely friendly people, the peace found in the noisy city, the everywhere can be a dance floor lifestyle... And just when you felt that it was all just... right... you were hit by the fact that you have to go home... Home? You thought to yourself, felt strangely warm and weird, nothing feels right, but nothing feels wrong too...
When you start to realize that the beautiful dream has long gone and the harsh reality takes over your life, you landed up in a job you never dared to think about.. working with a child of differential needs.
It was a hard first couple of months, being screamed at, smacked, hair pulled, dealing with buckets of tears, but the outcome was so fulfilling, you thought for a moment that you could do this for a long long time.
Then the monstrous feeling of comfort sets in and you suddenly caught yourself getting bored of the mundane life you have, yearning for adventures once again, although you are literally going through adventures with the lil boy every single day.
Years went by, you decided that it's time to change... To change for the better, courageously gobbled down whatever pie life serves you, and woke up realizing, this isn't your kind of pie. More wasted time, more things to whine about, you learned that you do not work well with time aplenty.
You ferociously gobble down this pie, hoping that it will leave your life as soon as possible, looking forward to the new pie life has to offer, hoping it will feel better...
You waited and waited, hoping something wonderful will appear, and you noticed that piece of pie that has been lying around for quite some time and decided, maybe this is it, it has been around for some time, maybe it's time to take a bite, and at first bite, you feel it inside your bones that this is not the piece of pie you have been looking forward to. You thought to yourself, well, you have already taken a bite, it's your responsibility to finish it...
Until today you are still trying your best to finish that piece of pie, anticipating the next piece of pie, hoping that it's what you have been looking for...
Will you ever find it? Or will the monstrous comfort tie you down in this uncomfortable yet relaxing life? Who knows? Time flew faster than anyone can and along the way, time meets age, will you ever?
🎵What's Inside - Sara Bareilles (Song from the Musical Waitress)
Monday, October 30, 2017
Good day!
I guess today is one of those days that I feel more inspired and energetic as usual.
It's funny how these things actually translates to how I behave, and that even sis could spot that I am extra chatty and cheerful than other days (Not that I am normally gloomy, but I am just a lil' more hyped up than usual).
Its' funnny how discovering about yourself could make one feel so much better in terms of coming into terms of my feelings and suspicions.
What happened today?
Well, it has to start yesterday when I managed to do something right and stayed at grands.
It resulted in early rising and a earlier head start on this beautiful day,
Which then led to earlier arrival and the opportunity to go through the entire service.
And with service, it was a reminder of how we as a church should move in order to receive and spread grace.
Though this ain't the first time I've heard of it, it was refreshing listening to the lesson with my homies, hopefully it sparks some hope in our future...
In the second session, we were given a chance to learn about our 4-alphabet types and understand the roles we play in church,
Never have I imagined that personality tests could be applied in the roles we play in church, and.it was like the gates of enlightenment opened and much of what we have been feeeling all this while fell into words, and words explained some kind of phenomena a few of us were trying to explain but yield no results.
It was rather lonely, but it feels great when someone explains the inner conflicts and monologues one may experience to the entire congregation, it seems like a pass to be who I've wanted to be or what i really am without all the judgements...
It just felt great to have insights even though I knew my personality type long time ago.
The future is bleak still, but at least we should still be the good news people, there's still hope.
An idealist can dream dreams, and may this idealist's dreams come true!
It was a great day, grands was superb and it made me feel like a proud parent just looking into a contented grands... Aww....
On side note, Kleff Eco-film fest was superb. Had the privilege of watching one of it's session, it was insightful and delightful. Just hoped that when people watched them, it stirs something deep inside them and actions can be taken care of.
P/S : I also got mysel a Nature Core lap desk which I absolutely love!!
There's so much to be done for the environment, we have to learn to contribute by at least decreasing our rubbish amount!
It's just a great day and I'm contented.
Thank you Lord for this wonderful day! =)
Thanks Uncle E for the reflections.
Thanks to all Eco warriors or the work to protect Mother Nature.
Thanks to the fambam and grans!
Bon Iver / Birdy - Skinny Love
It's funny how these things actually translates to how I behave, and that even sis could spot that I am extra chatty and cheerful than other days (Not that I am normally gloomy, but I am just a lil' more hyped up than usual).
Its' funnny how discovering about yourself could make one feel so much better in terms of coming into terms of my feelings and suspicions.
What happened today?
Well, it has to start yesterday when I managed to do something right and stayed at grands.
It resulted in early rising and a earlier head start on this beautiful day,
Which then led to earlier arrival and the opportunity to go through the entire service.
And with service, it was a reminder of how we as a church should move in order to receive and spread grace.
Though this ain't the first time I've heard of it, it was refreshing listening to the lesson with my homies, hopefully it sparks some hope in our future...
In the second session, we were given a chance to learn about our 4-alphabet types and understand the roles we play in church,
Never have I imagined that personality tests could be applied in the roles we play in church, and.it was like the gates of enlightenment opened and much of what we have been feeeling all this while fell into words, and words explained some kind of phenomena a few of us were trying to explain but yield no results.
It was rather lonely, but it feels great when someone explains the inner conflicts and monologues one may experience to the entire congregation, it seems like a pass to be who I've wanted to be or what i really am without all the judgements...
It just felt great to have insights even though I knew my personality type long time ago.
The future is bleak still, but at least we should still be the good news people, there's still hope.
An idealist can dream dreams, and may this idealist's dreams come true!
It was a great day, grands was superb and it made me feel like a proud parent just looking into a contented grands... Aww....
On side note, Kleff Eco-film fest was superb. Had the privilege of watching one of it's session, it was insightful and delightful. Just hoped that when people watched them, it stirs something deep inside them and actions can be taken care of.
P/S : I also got mysel a Nature Core lap desk which I absolutely love!!
There's so much to be done for the environment, we have to learn to contribute by at least decreasing our rubbish amount!
It's just a great day and I'm contented.
Thank you Lord for this wonderful day! =)
Thanks Uncle E for the reflections.
Thanks to all Eco warriors or the work to protect Mother Nature.
Thanks to the fambam and grans!
Bon Iver / Birdy - Skinny Love
Wednesday, October 4, 2017
La-di-Da
Had been thinking or writing another post recently and finally got to do it.
There hasn't been much going on lately, everyday is just another day of wondering and finding out how to make the day a little useful.
I have so much to talk about, but yet, nothing comes out of my mouth.
And once something comes out of the mouth, it isn't what I wanted to say. Weird, right? Being someone who thinks a whole lot but could not allow the thoughts and feelings flow out.
Am in another phase of life now, it isn't marriage or sort, but I guess is where I feel too old to be young anymore, but yet live a relatively kiddish lifestyle which I myself feel hard to stomach too. It's also the time when I find myself dull and boring, unlike to fun, adventurous person I hope to be. Change is a funny thing. It gets people excited, but at the same time dread for it to happen. The most challenging part of being someone of habit is that changing of lifestyle seldom take place. For example, my parents have been people who follows the exact same routines and habits, which is why we seldom do adventurous outings or tried exotic food. During uni, I've seen myself as someone as outgoing and open as anyone else, but to my surprise, I almost always follow the safe side of the road, eat the safest possible food I can find, and tend to do things the 'safe' way, which is the way I am used to. Even mindsets alike. Oh gosh, how can I be so similar to my parents despite knowingly know that that's not how I want to lead my life?
Speaking of which, I would like to talk about the 'theory of speaking your mid out'. It does sound a bit funny, but do hear me out. So, as someone who thinks quite a bit (at least I'd like to think so), I am often jumbled in thoughts and finds it difficult to align my thoughts well that most of the time, I tend to use the 'wing it' method. I just say whatever comes up on top of my mind, hoping that it will be the best thing that would come out of my mouth, and often times regret what I said or didn't say, struggling to find ways to make good whatever is left undone. That's the most part of my life, 'winging it. It's not like I am particularly proud of it, but it's reflection I made myself.
Been hoping to start another blog where I can write 'professionally', thinking that I'll always have the content to write about and did some research about other platforms to do so besides my own personal blog. It surprises me how much confidence I have in myself before this. haha... Where did I gather all those confidence to start another blog when I can barely speak anything which makes sense to the people I know? Still, there's this weird aspiration that I have in me that tells myself, it's time to start one. hahahah..
There hasn't been much going on lately, everyday is just another day of wondering and finding out how to make the day a little useful.
I have so much to talk about, but yet, nothing comes out of my mouth.
And once something comes out of the mouth, it isn't what I wanted to say. Weird, right? Being someone who thinks a whole lot but could not allow the thoughts and feelings flow out.
Am in another phase of life now, it isn't marriage or sort, but I guess is where I feel too old to be young anymore, but yet live a relatively kiddish lifestyle which I myself feel hard to stomach too. It's also the time when I find myself dull and boring, unlike to fun, adventurous person I hope to be. Change is a funny thing. It gets people excited, but at the same time dread for it to happen. The most challenging part of being someone of habit is that changing of lifestyle seldom take place. For example, my parents have been people who follows the exact same routines and habits, which is why we seldom do adventurous outings or tried exotic food. During uni, I've seen myself as someone as outgoing and open as anyone else, but to my surprise, I almost always follow the safe side of the road, eat the safest possible food I can find, and tend to do things the 'safe' way, which is the way I am used to. Even mindsets alike. Oh gosh, how can I be so similar to my parents despite knowingly know that that's not how I want to lead my life?
Speaking of which, I would like to talk about the 'theory of speaking your mid out'. It does sound a bit funny, but do hear me out. So, as someone who thinks quite a bit (at least I'd like to think so), I am often jumbled in thoughts and finds it difficult to align my thoughts well that most of the time, I tend to use the 'wing it' method. I just say whatever comes up on top of my mind, hoping that it will be the best thing that would come out of my mouth, and often times regret what I said or didn't say, struggling to find ways to make good whatever is left undone. That's the most part of my life, 'winging it. It's not like I am particularly proud of it, but it's reflection I made myself.
Been hoping to start another blog where I can write 'professionally', thinking that I'll always have the content to write about and did some research about other platforms to do so besides my own personal blog. It surprises me how much confidence I have in myself before this. haha... Where did I gather all those confidence to start another blog when I can barely speak anything which makes sense to the people I know? Still, there's this weird aspiration that I have in me that tells myself, it's time to start one. hahahah..
Wednesday, February 8, 2017
Speak up
Aloha peeps!
We are done with the first week of February and that also means we are close to the end of Chinese New Year for 2017.
Am writing today to just shed some perspective on certain thing that was on my mind today.
I've just completed my last class on Autism. I must say, I am really glad that I am done. I love that we ended with one of the best teachers in the college which was great.
Throughout my 2 years working in the special needs field, I felt that I learned a lot about special needs especially about autism. But I guess one can never learn enough. I watched a documentary entitled Living with Autism by BBC Horizons hosted by Uta Frith who spent the past 50 years trying to learn about autism. (Kindly click on the hyperlink and watch it yourself).
It is indeed enlightening and it really sparked me to share this out as the stigma and discrimination that they face, even with teachers who are learning about special education are immense. Perhaps it's really a wake up call for me to start shedding positive light on these unique group of individuals whom I've always hoped to become when I was younger in order to clear the misunderstandings people have on them.
After some deep thoughts about not going anywhere in my life at the moment, it sparked me to realize that one of the reasons for my inability to move from where I am is that I am not making any stand or actively doing what I truly believe in.... Still figuring out what it is, but one has to start somewhere.
So I decided that it will be to talk and share to others about what I know in terms of the environment and also individuals with special needs.
This is also the same for those who are ranting and talking bad about the political and economic situations in and out of our country. Talking about them and just go 'Oh well, what can we do?' proved that whatever discussion that has taken place is invalid as no actions were done in spite of the heated debates going on. To be honest, I am one of those people and all those negative talking are not helping. Whatever I am doing, there must be some sort of action that contributes to those angry and tired talks, be it a protest, sharing a statement, create our own ideas on what can improve the situation and act on it might help because feeling helpless, gets one nowhere.
Other than that, another recent thought came by when V was questioning about how one can turn into a totally different person overnight. From someone closest to you into someone who's cold and aloof. When it was being said the first thing that came to mind is that, perhaps the person was blind, there were many times the someone has been aloof or uninterested, but they are just blinded to it. I guess people don't just turn cold and aloof overnight, but rather, after a LOOOOOOONG contemplation and struggling in a relationship, going back and forth in their minds whether they should stop this sort of struggle and finally decided, that very fine day, that they will stop everything there and then. It is a decision made, rather than people really change one fine day. Well, that's what I think and how I rationalize this mind boggling question that I too questioned myself sometime back, but hopefully it is something that helps makes sense of the 'suddenly turned cold' situations.
I shall talk more soon.
If any of you are bored, the Super Bowl's half-time performances are pretty entertaining.
Makes one go, 'Wow, how can one cope when there's some much going on stage'
♫ Million Reasons - Lady Gaga
Thursday, January 19, 2017
Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close
I've finally did it!
Finally watched the movie who's poster file had been on my shelves for years,
It was as amazing as the name sounded,
As mysterious as the boy with blue eyes on it's poster is like.
It related to so many people in the world,
But yet the determination of the young boy seemed absurd.
Extremely Loud, Incredibly Close,
A perfect sentiment used to portray the life of many people in the world,
Especially a small fraction of people who are just a little odd, or thinks a lil different than the boring commoners,
Yes, I am talking about children with special needs with sensory issues.
This movie is way better than what I expected it to be.
The first time I saw the name, I was really keen that this will be a mind blowing movie,
And indeed it is and even more.
The innocence of a child can' t be replaced by anything and the hope and memory keeps things alive.
The tireless search of a child, and the love of his parents,
Just love love love this movie.
Definitely added to the favorite list!
Would go on and on about how I love the movie and which part was the best, but I shall let it up to you who are reading this to find out which are yours.
Thank you Oskar Schell, you are incredible.
♪ Ho Hey- Lennon and Maisy
Finally watched the movie who's poster file had been on my shelves for years,
It was as amazing as the name sounded,
As mysterious as the boy with blue eyes on it's poster is like.
It related to so many people in the world,
But yet the determination of the young boy seemed absurd.
Extremely Loud, Incredibly Close,
A perfect sentiment used to portray the life of many people in the world,
Especially a small fraction of people who are just a little odd, or thinks a lil different than the boring commoners,
Yes, I am talking about children with special needs with sensory issues.
This movie is way better than what I expected it to be.
The first time I saw the name, I was really keen that this will be a mind blowing movie,
And indeed it is and even more.
The innocence of a child can' t be replaced by anything and the hope and memory keeps things alive.
The tireless search of a child, and the love of his parents,
Just love love love this movie.
Definitely added to the favorite list!
Would go on and on about how I love the movie and which part was the best, but I shall let it up to you who are reading this to find out which are yours.
Thank you Oskar Schell, you are incredible.
♪ Ho Hey- Lennon and Maisy
Monday, December 5, 2016
Oh well...
I guess some times it really takes some time to realize how fast things become past tense and that it's time to move on and go on to the next thing in life.
Can't tell if that time is really moving fast or that I am too slow to understand what is going on in life.
Maybe I am just too ignorant.
Many things seem to be coming to an end very very soon, a part of me feels a teeny wheeny relieve that it's going to be over soon, but a huge part of me is still lingering about how well life has been for the past few years.
I guesss all we have to do is to wait and see,...
I guess 2016 really markss the ending to many things...
Brexit,
Obama's office,
Resignation of New Zealand's and Italy's Presidents,
Jobs, jobs, jobs,
A cute Cambodian friend's life,
A once very close friendship,
AOF,
School life...
I heard of a song dissing 2016, and it seems so relevant to be sung as it hasn't quite been a year of positive encounters.
I guess 2017 will be the beginning of a world of unknown and uncertainties...
Dear Lord, please bless all of us...
* No song playing in my mind that's relevant to my current mood right now. Shall sign off with a :)
Good night world.
Thursday, September 8, 2016
Ramblings
It's funny, how life turns out to be.
One moment you found this someone who seems to be the closest person you could ever be with a stranger,
but in another moment, two people can just turn, cold as though never met before.
Life really has no guarantee, be it for family, friends, partners or colleagues,
Perhaps its always better to meet strangers, and... remain strangers,
At least the novelty will be around,
the heart to understand each other will continue to pound,
the curiosity towards this other being that you first met will be intriguing,
the courteous manner and the open mind seems to make meetings more pleasant...
So, why do we need people whom are close to you then?
When all you every said or share can turn into ashes in a split second,
by as slip of mouth,
a broken promise,
a lie,
a deeper understanding towards this other person that you wished you've never knew...
I really wonder.
But on the bright side, there's always a good reason to have someone close to you,
at least you can have someone, it could be just an idea or a real person to share things with,
happy and sad things,
a place to rant, and a place for hugs and seemingly encouraging words,
someone who seems more angry than you when bad things dawn upon you,
a partner in crime, a person to laugh at your crazy jokes,
a person to tell you all the ugly truths about you that no strangers dare to,
a friend or family.
________________________________________________________________
My previous post talked about a change in my life that I want to have,
well, change happened, although not a huge one, but I hope that it's only going to get better.
Heavy eyelids preventing me from typing any longer.
Good night world.
One moment you found this someone who seems to be the closest person you could ever be with a stranger,
but in another moment, two people can just turn, cold as though never met before.
Life really has no guarantee, be it for family, friends, partners or colleagues,
Perhaps its always better to meet strangers, and... remain strangers,
At least the novelty will be around,
the heart to understand each other will continue to pound,
the curiosity towards this other being that you first met will be intriguing,
the courteous manner and the open mind seems to make meetings more pleasant...
So, why do we need people whom are close to you then?
When all you every said or share can turn into ashes in a split second,
by as slip of mouth,
a broken promise,
a lie,
a deeper understanding towards this other person that you wished you've never knew...
I really wonder.
But on the bright side, there's always a good reason to have someone close to you,
at least you can have someone, it could be just an idea or a real person to share things with,
happy and sad things,
a place to rant, and a place for hugs and seemingly encouraging words,
someone who seems more angry than you when bad things dawn upon you,
a partner in crime, a person to laugh at your crazy jokes,
a person to tell you all the ugly truths about you that no strangers dare to,
a friend or family.
________________________________________________________________
My previous post talked about a change in my life that I want to have,
well, change happened, although not a huge one, but I hope that it's only going to get better.
Heavy eyelids preventing me from typing any longer.
Good night world.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Why am I still here?
My heart is raving for a new change in life,
But I guess the hesitation of letting go is holding me back.
There's this part in my that can't wait to explore the world,
See new sights, learn new things, meet new people,
Do new things
And leave whatever part in life that's mundane, and boring...
Why am I still here?
That's the question I ask each and everyday...
Changes happen all the time...
It's time to bid goodbye to someone great,
Who made significant change in the school system,
But there's always this hindrance that makes all the great people move on...
It will be a tough transition,
Despite the big change,
Things still seem to stay the same....
It's a conscious choice that was made,
But yet. I can't help asking myself again,..
Why am I still here.
My heart goes to Christina Grimmie,
An amazing singer whom played a part in introducing YouTube music to me...
Things change all of a sudden...
And at times, it puts a full stop on life...
May your beautiful voice continue to inspire those who is still stuck in this physical world..
May the light in the end of the tunnel shines in brightly soon,
It seems so hard to see the positive side of things with so much to worry about..
Hope that everything will be ok.
Love is Easy - McFly
But I guess the hesitation of letting go is holding me back.
There's this part in my that can't wait to explore the world,
See new sights, learn new things, meet new people,
Do new things
And leave whatever part in life that's mundane, and boring...
Why am I still here?
That's the question I ask each and everyday...
Changes happen all the time...
It's time to bid goodbye to someone great,
Who made significant change in the school system,
But there's always this hindrance that makes all the great people move on...
It will be a tough transition,
Despite the big change,
Things still seem to stay the same....
It's a conscious choice that was made,
But yet. I can't help asking myself again,..
Why am I still here.
My heart goes to Christina Grimmie,
An amazing singer whom played a part in introducing YouTube music to me...
Things change all of a sudden...
And at times, it puts a full stop on life...
May your beautiful voice continue to inspire those who is still stuck in this physical world..
May the light in the end of the tunnel shines in brightly soon,
It seems so hard to see the positive side of things with so much to worry about..
Hope that everything will be ok.
Love is Easy - McFly
Friday, April 15, 2016
Late nights, cool beans
It's just interesting to know that as much as blogs are a HUGE thing now in today's world, almost everyone I know stopped writing them. People simply moved on and stopped dwelling in these sacred place where we spent many late nights browsing, reading about people's life, rants and thoughts.
Shall leave a word or two here in since I feel that this is one of those nights when I blog. haha.
Just finished watching a series and it makes me think a lot in the series. Is change for the better when we feel that we are really happy? I've seen many people, singers/composers especially, take a totally different path after they deemed to have been 'renewed' in life came back into business. They all seemed happy, but the music they make is just not the same any more, it's like without all the struggles and pain, the sound isn't as awesome anymore.
Anyway, it's really weird to come back here after almost 2 years of absence, only to find that so many widgets that used to be the IN thing, disappeared or has been obsolete. It's like a part of me is wiped out just like that, after spending so much time customizing, trying to make the blog as personalized as it could be, and now, many of the links or tools are just... gone.
Life has been ok so far. Looking forward to a Looooong vacation or break back to nature. Although I haven't talked about it here, I miss being in YNP every single day. The longing doesn't stop although you know nothing over there will be the same again. Hoping hard to get a getaway, have some time to think about Life for a bit, to be able to breathe without feeling that life may fall apart if you breathe too hard, or forget something. I may have the lowest stress inducing job available, but in this big city life, Stress is in the air, there's no escape from it. A small town girl like me catches the stress and all of a sudden feels so overwhelmed with her life even when there's not much to fuss about. As much as I don't want to admit, city life can be a lot to bear even though one may not go out very often. It frustrates me about how lonely the walk can despite having so many people walking beside you. No wonder many suffer from depression and other anxiety issues even though they are constantly with someone... It just feels so empty inside.
Moving on, May will be a big transition for many of us, it's like another part of my life will be torn apart and taken away from me. I don't really know how I will feel then, but will just live day by day until time comes and each and everyone who are affected will seek ways to adapt to the change that is bound to happen in life. There is so much to ponder about and to be sorted out then. The adjustment period for all of us... Am hoping for the better. Hope to seek refuge in this big confusing world.
Toodles! =)
I Am Alive - Jason Mraz and JJ Lin
Shall leave a word or two here in since I feel that this is one of those nights when I blog. haha.
Just finished watching a series and it makes me think a lot in the series. Is change for the better when we feel that we are really happy? I've seen many people, singers/composers especially, take a totally different path after they deemed to have been 'renewed' in life came back into business. They all seemed happy, but the music they make is just not the same any more, it's like without all the struggles and pain, the sound isn't as awesome anymore.
Anyway, it's really weird to come back here after almost 2 years of absence, only to find that so many widgets that used to be the IN thing, disappeared or has been obsolete. It's like a part of me is wiped out just like that, after spending so much time customizing, trying to make the blog as personalized as it could be, and now, many of the links or tools are just... gone.
Life has been ok so far. Looking forward to a Looooong vacation or break back to nature. Although I haven't talked about it here, I miss being in YNP every single day. The longing doesn't stop although you know nothing over there will be the same again. Hoping hard to get a getaway, have some time to think about Life for a bit, to be able to breathe without feeling that life may fall apart if you breathe too hard, or forget something. I may have the lowest stress inducing job available, but in this big city life, Stress is in the air, there's no escape from it. A small town girl like me catches the stress and all of a sudden feels so overwhelmed with her life even when there's not much to fuss about. As much as I don't want to admit, city life can be a lot to bear even though one may not go out very often. It frustrates me about how lonely the walk can despite having so many people walking beside you. No wonder many suffer from depression and other anxiety issues even though they are constantly with someone... It just feels so empty inside.
Moving on, May will be a big transition for many of us, it's like another part of my life will be torn apart and taken away from me. I don't really know how I will feel then, but will just live day by day until time comes and each and everyone who are affected will seek ways to adapt to the change that is bound to happen in life. There is so much to ponder about and to be sorted out then. The adjustment period for all of us... Am hoping for the better. Hope to seek refuge in this big confusing world.
Toodles! =)
I Am Alive - Jason Mraz and JJ Lin
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
Surprise! Of love and packages
I have been wanting to write this special occasion down
So that I wont forget it one day.
So, yours truly isnt JUST adult anymore.
This year, it was quiet...
Though it was on a Sunday,
It was really really quiet...
No one remembers the insignificant event,
Just a couple of special ones remembered.
I guessed its also the best celebration in a sense.
It felt a bit weird to only get a text about it...
But I got a whole lot of love from the special few.
First off...
I found a package outside my house one fine day...
And I thought it was a magazine..
But when I saw those stamps...
I knew who's the mastermind behind all this...
My silly friend took all the trouble to make sure I receive an airmail before the day..
I was shocked!
The first ever airmailed package!!!!! Hahaha...
Someone remembered after all!!!
It sat on my bed for 2 whole weeks before it saw light..
Then, a very cute friend of mine made an appointment so that she could call me!
She is wayyy too cute.
And we talked on that day! Haha...
She was so worried I wont be free to pick up a call... haha..
And on that day,
It was way quieter than the other years...
But I like it that way...
My mom and sis planted a gift in my room by midnight,
Sis posted on my wall to make sure I see it...
And now the cute lil thing is sitting on my bed! ^^
Dad, he was way funny...
He said that he was heading to KL,
So I wasn't expecting to have dinner with him.
And spent the afternoon decorating our lil Christmas tree...
Its the most beautiful tree ever!
Well, at least to me.
The night before, us gals sat down and made ornaments fkr our tree... i
It was fun....
A day I longed for a loong loong time..
Us doing things together..
I knew mom and sis are trying hard to make me feel happy...
And I was, indeed..
After that, I wanted to watch Nodame the movie agaun,
Mom spent the afternoon watching it with me..
Then, dad came back.. with cake. Haha..
And he brought us out for dinner and we brought granny!! ^^
It was a wonderful meal..
After meal and cake, I got to found that
Dad spent the afternoon running around for my gift.
They were wayyy too cute! Haha...
Granny was happy, I was happy...
For the first time in a looong time,
I feel very special on my day...
thanks to my wonderful and amazing FAMILY!!! ^^
And my special friends.
I got a special gift from someone by midnight too which made it even better..
Two days after,
Mom woke me up...
Apparently a box came for me...
She thought it was a purchase..
When I saw it... I was shocked...
It passed by many countries to get here,
another silly friend of mind did it again.
I was totally speechless looking at it.
And boy it was heavy...
I have never received such a huge gift before..
Nothing really flew in independently to be fore
Just so I feel loved on my special day.
This time, I got so many surprises...
I really wonder who did I do to deserve such family and friendships...
But I really do cherish and treasure these unique individuals,
Who knows how to make me feel like the most special individual,
Even though its just for a day.
To my lovely people,
I love you all tru and tru...
I thank God for letting you guys enter my life and me into yours...
May you all be blessed with tons of wonderful blessings,
just as how you guys blessed me...
From the deepest sincerity in my heart,
Thank You So So Much...
Thank You - Jayesslee
So that I wont forget it one day.
So, yours truly isnt JUST adult anymore.
This year, it was quiet...
Though it was on a Sunday,
It was really really quiet...
No one remembers the insignificant event,
Just a couple of special ones remembered.
I guessed its also the best celebration in a sense.
It felt a bit weird to only get a text about it...
But I got a whole lot of love from the special few.
First off...
I found a package outside my house one fine day...
And I thought it was a magazine..
But when I saw those stamps...
I knew who's the mastermind behind all this...
My silly friend took all the trouble to make sure I receive an airmail before the day..
I was shocked!
The first ever airmailed package!!!!! Hahaha...
Someone remembered after all!!!
It sat on my bed for 2 whole weeks before it saw light..
Then, a very cute friend of mine made an appointment so that she could call me!
She is wayyy too cute.
And we talked on that day! Haha...
She was so worried I wont be free to pick up a call... haha..
And on that day,
It was way quieter than the other years...
But I like it that way...
My mom and sis planted a gift in my room by midnight,
Sis posted on my wall to make sure I see it...
And now the cute lil thing is sitting on my bed! ^^
Dad, he was way funny...
He said that he was heading to KL,
So I wasn't expecting to have dinner with him.
And spent the afternoon decorating our lil Christmas tree...
Its the most beautiful tree ever!
Well, at least to me.
The night before, us gals sat down and made ornaments fkr our tree... i
It was fun....
A day I longed for a loong loong time..
Us doing things together..
I knew mom and sis are trying hard to make me feel happy...
And I was, indeed..
After that, I wanted to watch Nodame the movie agaun,
Mom spent the afternoon watching it with me..
Then, dad came back.. with cake. Haha..
And he brought us out for dinner and we brought granny!! ^^
It was a wonderful meal..
After meal and cake, I got to found that
Dad spent the afternoon running around for my gift.
They were wayyy too cute! Haha...
Granny was happy, I was happy...
For the first time in a looong time,
I feel very special on my day...
thanks to my wonderful and amazing FAMILY!!! ^^
And my special friends.
I got a special gift from someone by midnight too which made it even better..
Two days after,
Mom woke me up...
Apparently a box came for me...
She thought it was a purchase..
When I saw it... I was shocked...
It passed by many countries to get here,
another silly friend of mind did it again.
I was totally speechless looking at it.
And boy it was heavy...
I have never received such a huge gift before..
Nothing really flew in independently to be fore
Just so I feel loved on my special day.
This time, I got so many surprises...
I really wonder who did I do to deserve such family and friendships...
But I really do cherish and treasure these unique individuals,
Who knows how to make me feel like the most special individual,
Even though its just for a day.
To my lovely people,
I love you all tru and tru...
I thank God for letting you guys enter my life and me into yours...
May you all be blessed with tons of wonderful blessings,
just as how you guys blessed me...
From the deepest sincerity in my heart,
Thank You So So Much...
Thank You - Jayesslee
Thursday, November 20, 2014
Abyss
Am not sure if anyone reads this anymore, but I have this suddenly urge to post something here today, after
3 years of Psychology Degree education,
10 days of my first outreach in Philippines,
4 months of wonderful time working with a bunch of cheerful people,
4 days in Siem Reap, AOF mission trip,
4 months working and living in a real life dream, Yellowstone National Park,
1 month traveling around the well know cities in the States,
and 1 month plus at home,
I am sitting right here, right now, aimless, passing day by day wondering,
What's next?
I practically lived in a dream for the past few months,
Doing things I would have never imagined myself doing,
completing the course I've been wanting to complete more than half of my life,
being to places where I didn't even know existed last year,
Saw the most beautiful sceneries in the world,
met some amazing people who are different from anyone I've met before...
What now? What's next?
I find myself ruminating about these 2 questions a lot recently.
Let's face it, I still want to continue this wonderful dream,
thinking life is a bliss,
Telling myself that don't have to worry about life, money, work, education, family...
And continue the wonderful streak of seeing new heights alone.
I can't help but to replay the memories I had in Yellowstone,
I won't lie...
They made me feel special in a way,
Gave me a special place to be at,
reminded me that I left a part of me there when took my last bus ride out of Yellowstone and never came back....
But when I wake up from that beautiful dream, I feel like a brat.
You see, I sort of lost the ability to think,
to plan, to be competent,
to do fore-thinking, to be hardworking....
And I hate that...
I read lots of articles on how to be more efficient,
how to make the best out of our time,
how to behave like a VIP in life, being on top of the game all the time...
I know all the tips, but I don't feel any different.
Like most people, I went to Yellowstone thinking that I will get to see a bigger picture of my life,
While working in a different country with people of different nations around the world, waiting for that 'A-HA' moment to wake me up and know what I want to do next...
It never did wake me up.... I am still dreaming.... which is, sad...
Anyway, just wanted to rant as I don't really know what to do at this very moment.
Yes, I am a tad bit sad that I didn't get to blog when I was in Yellowstone...
There was always so much to do, so many peopele to meet, so many places to go....
While I swim in the liquid of abyss in my mind, I shall continue to hope that the Lord will shine the way.... And I won't make a decision that I will never regret....
Good night peeps...
3 years of Psychology Degree education,
10 days of my first outreach in Philippines,
4 months of wonderful time working with a bunch of cheerful people,
4 days in Siem Reap, AOF mission trip,
4 months working and living in a real life dream, Yellowstone National Park,
1 month traveling around the well know cities in the States,
and 1 month plus at home,
I am sitting right here, right now, aimless, passing day by day wondering,
What's next?
I practically lived in a dream for the past few months,
Doing things I would have never imagined myself doing,
completing the course I've been wanting to complete more than half of my life,
being to places where I didn't even know existed last year,
Saw the most beautiful sceneries in the world,
met some amazing people who are different from anyone I've met before...
What now? What's next?
I find myself ruminating about these 2 questions a lot recently.
Let's face it, I still want to continue this wonderful dream,
thinking life is a bliss,
Telling myself that don't have to worry about life, money, work, education, family...
And continue the wonderful streak of seeing new heights alone.
I can't help but to replay the memories I had in Yellowstone,
I won't lie...
They made me feel special in a way,
Gave me a special place to be at,
reminded me that I left a part of me there when took my last bus ride out of Yellowstone and never came back....
But when I wake up from that beautiful dream, I feel like a brat.
You see, I sort of lost the ability to think,
to plan, to be competent,
to do fore-thinking, to be hardworking....
And I hate that...
I read lots of articles on how to be more efficient,
how to make the best out of our time,
how to behave like a VIP in life, being on top of the game all the time...
I know all the tips, but I don't feel any different.
Like most people, I went to Yellowstone thinking that I will get to see a bigger picture of my life,
While working in a different country with people of different nations around the world, waiting for that 'A-HA' moment to wake me up and know what I want to do next...
It never did wake me up.... I am still dreaming.... which is, sad...
Anyway, just wanted to rant as I don't really know what to do at this very moment.
Yes, I am a tad bit sad that I didn't get to blog when I was in Yellowstone...
There was always so much to do, so many peopele to meet, so many places to go....
While I swim in the liquid of abyss in my mind, I shall continue to hope that the Lord will shine the way.... And I won't make a decision that I will never regret....
Good night peeps...
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
B team, B stands for BEST
This post was meant to be posted two weeks ago... But I didn't manage to click on the 'post' button, coz I really didn't want to say good bye.... But I am really touched right now, my heart feels a tinge of sadness mixed with a pinch of happiness.... J really made me feel like crying....
This part is written last week, when it was my last .
Everytime I listen to 'All of Me', my heart skips a beat.
It's really beautiful~~~
Am glad that it's also W's favourite song. =)
Have been on an euphoric mode the past two days.
I am just overjoyed..
The people around me,
Ivy, Jah, Ai, J, Linda and the lecturers were all so kind to me..
It's a bit overwhelming as they do many things that my own family and friends won't do for me.
They tell me what should I do in desperate occasions,
always there to my rescue whenever I meet difficult students,
made sure I was alright throughout my whole course of working with them,
saw that something was wrong with my legs asked me and scolded me for not going to the Dr.,
being the only people who replies to my funky lil' moves,
going along with whatever silly little tricks I was plotting,
taking pics even though they don't want to because I asked them to,
bringing me out for meals,
taking such a great care of me...
They get angry when I was 'bullied' by others,
knowing that I love to eat,
they made sure I get to try all sorts of food.
Oh ya, I shouldn't forget JG as well. The one who took the initiative to make sure I know what to do in US from head to toe.... Thanks dude! ^^
They always say they will miss me... They love me a lot...
Even my family don't say that to me that often.
Haha... I am the one who will miss them dearly.
For the past four months, they have been my friends, sisters and family...
I don't know how to write out how I am feeling right now,
but it's joyful + Sad at the same time...
Lord, you blessed me with all sorts of good things,
_______________________________________________________________________________
A tragic news was delivered last Sat morning,
a great man, Mr. Kenneth Phun was announced to have passed away in his sleep in a church retreat at Frasers Hill....
I woke up, reading this sad news on my tablet,
and I can feel that the rest of the gals were as shocked as me even though we didn't meet face to face...
I felt really bad as I remembered my last thought of him wasn't a good thought and I left without saying goodbye that day. I can't believe that I would never get to do that again...
Guilt can be a painful thing....
But lucky for me, W said something which makes sense:
We shouldn't rule out what a person has done just because they have passed away...
Yeah, many times we feel bad for not have much fond memories about a person
and feel that we should not think of them at all...
But the truth is, the person impacted us when they are alive and no matter whether we have good or bad memories of the person, we should not pretend that whatever that happened did not happen at all.
Guess this helped me realize that it's self-inflicted guilt and I should remember both the happy and not so happy memories of Mr. Kenneth, the jolly HOD who always have time to play. =)
This tragic event allowed me to stay at the department for one more day.
We went to the wake together... And I am glad I went with them...
Tthe wake of this jolly man who had obviously inspired so many people throughout his life and is resulted by the number of people who came to attend his wake service.
I stumbled upon something which made me realize how much of a sister J is to me.
I am ever so blessed to be able to meet people who loves and care about me.
Now I have a keychain named after me!!! Hehehe...Feel so honoured and touched! Hehehe.... =D
Now I don't feel so reluctant to leave as I know I will be back and meet all of them again soon~
The one extra day I had is sufficient to know that our friendship will last for a long time. ^^
This part is written last week, when it was my last .
Everytime I listen to 'All of Me', my heart skips a beat.
It's really beautiful~~~
Am glad that it's also W's favourite song. =)
Have been on an euphoric mode the past two days.
I am just overjoyed..
The people around me,
Ivy, Jah, Ai, J, Linda and the lecturers were all so kind to me..
It's a bit overwhelming as they do many things that my own family and friends won't do for me.
They tell me what should I do in desperate occasions,
always there to my rescue whenever I meet difficult students,
made sure I was alright throughout my whole course of working with them,
saw that something was wrong with my legs asked me and scolded me for not going to the Dr.,
being the only people who replies to my funky lil' moves,
going along with whatever silly little tricks I was plotting,
taking pics even though they don't want to because I asked them to,
bringing me out for meals,
taking such a great care of me...
They get angry when I was 'bullied' by others,
knowing that I love to eat,
they made sure I get to try all sorts of food.
Oh ya, I shouldn't forget JG as well. The one who took the initiative to make sure I know what to do in US from head to toe.... Thanks dude! ^^
They always say they will miss me... They love me a lot...
Even my family don't say that to me that often.
Haha... I am the one who will miss them dearly.
For the past four months, they have been my friends, sisters and family...
I don't know how to write out how I am feeling right now,
but it's joyful + Sad at the same time...
Lord, you blessed me with all sorts of good things,
_______________________________________________________________________________
A tragic news was delivered last Sat morning,
a great man, Mr. Kenneth Phun was announced to have passed away in his sleep in a church retreat at Frasers Hill....
I woke up, reading this sad news on my tablet,
and I can feel that the rest of the gals were as shocked as me even though we didn't meet face to face...
I felt really bad as I remembered my last thought of him wasn't a good thought and I left without saying goodbye that day. I can't believe that I would never get to do that again...
Guilt can be a painful thing....
But lucky for me, W said something which makes sense:
We shouldn't rule out what a person has done just because they have passed away...
Yeah, many times we feel bad for not have much fond memories about a person
and feel that we should not think of them at all...
But the truth is, the person impacted us when they are alive and no matter whether we have good or bad memories of the person, we should not pretend that whatever that happened did not happen at all.
Guess this helped me realize that it's self-inflicted guilt and I should remember both the happy and not so happy memories of Mr. Kenneth, the jolly HOD who always have time to play. =)
This tragic event allowed me to stay at the department for one more day.
We went to the wake together... And I am glad I went with them...
Tthe wake of this jolly man who had obviously inspired so many people throughout his life and is resulted by the number of people who came to attend his wake service.
I stumbled upon something which made me realize how much of a sister J is to me.
I am ever so blessed to be able to meet people who loves and care about me.
Now I have a keychain named after me!!! Hehehe...Feel so honoured and touched! Hehehe.... =D
Now I don't feel so reluctant to leave as I know I will be back and meet all of them again soon~
The one extra day I had is sufficient to know that our friendship will last for a long time. ^^
My Family, the people who had been my world for the past few months, who supported me in everything that I did... I cannot thank you all enough for being so amazing and for making me feel so wonderful...
Through the Fire-Chaka Khan
Friday, April 11, 2014
Because I'm Happy~
Its midnight again,
A time where my thoughts run free,
when my brain is most stimulated.
Am munching a plum right now, an expensive plum which daddy bought for me just beacuse I craved for it.
It's not sweet, or amazing, not the kind of plum I was craving,
but its really satisfying.
For the past few months I have been validated more times than I had ever been my whole life.
I can't tell enough how awesome my colleagues make me feel,
though I know that I am not that great at all...
But today was the day I feel loved and wonderful.
One major part of my job is to validate people's parking token,
I had to validate around 30 tokens each day and they come at differing times of the day.
They were all very friendly and polite,
and I am secretly glad that I had to do the job as I get to meet and talk to people everyday.
There's this pretty lady who always comes in with a smile,
and never failed to strike a conversation with me, even if it's just a brief 'How are you?'.
She's my fav among all those who comes to validate their token.
Today she came again, as usual passing me her token to be validated and put a Gloria Jeans box on my table. I thought she was just putting it there as she waited for me so I did not pay any attention to it.
Then she passed me the box,
saying 'This is for you. Thank You for always smiling, I know it's not easy to do it everyday... It means a lot to me...'
It caught me in surprise as I would never think that people would thank me for small little things like that.
But at the same time I was touched that she is so thoughtful as to remember me...
For something that I don't do consciously, it mattered to her, I am glad.
As she was in the midst of talking to my colleague, I overheard that it's sort of like her last day coming so often as she finished her practicuum.
I was a bit sad and I didn't know what to do, because she's the first I'll be saying bye bye to before I finish my contract...
I wanted to give her something to thank her for making my job a lil' more interesting,
but I didn't have anything with me..
In the end, all I did was to ask her if I can take a picture of her.
Had to use Olympus as Nikon wasn't with me today...
Her Chocolate Hazelnut pie (Or something like that) really made my day...
She said it's her favorite and she hope that I'll like it,
it was touching and I really really feel grateful and the pie is super YUMMY!!!!!
Hope to see her again soon! =)
I'm a happy girl! ^^
Thanks Christy! You're so cute and beautiful at the same time, all the best with your internship! ^^
Just now this thought came into my mind:
Devils are like dust,
We have to clean it everytime, thinking that we will be clean after that,
But it comes back,
Then you'll have to sweep it clean again, and it comes back again...
Dust never actually go away, they just disperse and comes back and clot until it's visible to us.
It's just like how we are everyday, we try to keep ourselves away from the devils.
but the it keeps coming back,
and many times we live with dust,
feeling lazy to clean it off...
Forgetting God's word, forget to read the bible,
Forget to ask Him for help.
So we succumb to sinning.
I guess what we need to do is to clean the dust daily,
read His Words each and everyday to keep the devil away,
even though he doesn't actually go way, at least we can remind ourselves to keep away from him.
I really hope that this dust analogy can be my motivation to read His Words. hehe..
Shallows-Daughter
A time where my thoughts run free,
when my brain is most stimulated.
Am munching a plum right now, an expensive plum which daddy bought for me just beacuse I craved for it.
It's not sweet, or amazing, not the kind of plum I was craving,
but its really satisfying.
For the past few months I have been validated more times than I had ever been my whole life.
I can't tell enough how awesome my colleagues make me feel,
though I know that I am not that great at all...
But today was the day I feel loved and wonderful.
One major part of my job is to validate people's parking token,
I had to validate around 30 tokens each day and they come at differing times of the day.
They were all very friendly and polite,
and I am secretly glad that I had to do the job as I get to meet and talk to people everyday.
There's this pretty lady who always comes in with a smile,
and never failed to strike a conversation with me, even if it's just a brief 'How are you?'.
She's my fav among all those who comes to validate their token.
Today she came again, as usual passing me her token to be validated and put a Gloria Jeans box on my table. I thought she was just putting it there as she waited for me so I did not pay any attention to it.
Then she passed me the box,
saying 'This is for you. Thank You for always smiling, I know it's not easy to do it everyday... It means a lot to me...'
It caught me in surprise as I would never think that people would thank me for small little things like that.
But at the same time I was touched that she is so thoughtful as to remember me...
For something that I don't do consciously, it mattered to her, I am glad.
As she was in the midst of talking to my colleague, I overheard that it's sort of like her last day coming so often as she finished her practicuum.
I was a bit sad and I didn't know what to do, because she's the first I'll be saying bye bye to before I finish my contract...
I wanted to give her something to thank her for making my job a lil' more interesting,
but I didn't have anything with me..
In the end, all I did was to ask her if I can take a picture of her.
Had to use Olympus as Nikon wasn't with me today...
Her Chocolate Hazelnut pie (Or something like that) really made my day...
She said it's her favorite and she hope that I'll like it,
it was touching and I really really feel grateful and the pie is super YUMMY!!!!!
Hope to see her again soon! =)
I'm a happy girl! ^^
Thanks Christy! You're so cute and beautiful at the same time, all the best with your internship! ^^
" People who can make others feel great are Great people themselves"...
Just now this thought came into my mind:
Devils are like dust,
We have to clean it everytime, thinking that we will be clean after that,
But it comes back,
Then you'll have to sweep it clean again, and it comes back again...
Dust never actually go away, they just disperse and comes back and clot until it's visible to us.
It's just like how we are everyday, we try to keep ourselves away from the devils.
but the it keeps coming back,
and many times we live with dust,
feeling lazy to clean it off...
Forgetting God's word, forget to read the bible,
Forget to ask Him for help.
So we succumb to sinning.
I guess what we need to do is to clean the dust daily,
read His Words each and everyday to keep the devil away,
even though he doesn't actually go way, at least we can remind ourselves to keep away from him.
I really hope that this dust analogy can be my motivation to read His Words. hehe..
Shallows-Daughter
Friday, April 4, 2014
There are times...
There are times when I would like to have a portable car.
A car which I can bring myself everywhere,
fetching the people I care a lot around,
pick them from their distress,
bring them to the most amazing ice-cream place ever,
bring the whole group of people to have a warm dinner together.
Sometimes I would like to drive a bus,
so I can fetch a whole bus full of people for the cause we all believe in,
to places we want to explore together,
to leave no one out from the adventures we embark on,
going anywhere and everywhere who needs us,
without having to worry about how to get to places.
Some times I just wish I have an eye for details,
the special ability to look at the small things in life,
to be able to spot mistakes,
make adjustments to the tiny whinny errors made,
to perfect the imperfections in everything,
to make the world a little prettier,
to help reduce the work of others.
Most of the time I would like to be more disciplined,
making sure that I do everything I want to do constantly,
reading the scriptures each and everyday,
listening to beautiful voices everyday,
jotting down each and every details of my life so I won't forget,
spare more time with the people I love,
to keep the words I have promised,
give to others to the best of my ability,
constantly.
There are also times when I wish I could be better,
being in a much further place than I am now,
to be able to know more about people,
without feeling a little less of my self,
to be able to improve from who I used to be,
be able to get better in the things I do from before,
instead of standing at the very same spot I was 5 years ago,
going no where...
But most of the time I am fascinated,
about many things in life,
like how come kids can say things like chicken in replacement to kitchen,
how amazing some people can be when they sing or play the violin,
how come such wonderful pictures can come from an amateur photographer,
how can people take pictures with such impact at a time of terror,
how freely birds can fly,
how amusing my colleagues find me to be,
how happy children in Cambodia can be,
how friendly Philippinos are,
how powerful love can be,
the way my parents show that they love me and my sister,
the secret to grandma's way of making me feel awesome,
the great creations God has made,
the love that God has for each and everyone of us...
how life is an irony that the more awesome I feel about myself, I feel worst about myself.
We can't always get what we want, so we just make the most of what we can get.
A car which I can bring myself everywhere,
fetching the people I care a lot around,
pick them from their distress,
bring them to the most amazing ice-cream place ever,
bring the whole group of people to have a warm dinner together.
Sometimes I would like to drive a bus,
so I can fetch a whole bus full of people for the cause we all believe in,
to places we want to explore together,
to leave no one out from the adventures we embark on,
going anywhere and everywhere who needs us,
without having to worry about how to get to places.
Some times I just wish I have an eye for details,
the special ability to look at the small things in life,
to be able to spot mistakes,
make adjustments to the tiny whinny errors made,
to perfect the imperfections in everything,
to help reduce the work of others.
Most of the time I would like to be more disciplined,
making sure that I do everything I want to do constantly,
reading the scriptures each and everyday,
listening to beautiful voices everyday,
jotting down each and every details of my life so I won't forget,
spare more time with the people I love,
to keep the words I have promised,
give to others to the best of my ability,
constantly.
There are also times when I wish I could be better,
being in a much further place than I am now,
to be able to know more about people,
without feeling a little less of my self,
to be able to improve from who I used to be,
be able to get better in the things I do from before,
instead of standing at the very same spot I was 5 years ago,
going no where...
But most of the time I am fascinated,
about many things in life,
like how come kids can say things like chicken in replacement to kitchen,
how amazing some people can be when they sing or play the violin,
how come such wonderful pictures can come from an amateur photographer,
how can people take pictures with such impact at a time of terror,
how freely birds can fly,
how amusing my colleagues find me to be,
how happy children in Cambodia can be,
how friendly Philippinos are,
how powerful love can be,
the way my parents show that they love me and my sister,
the secret to grandma's way of making me feel awesome,
the great creations God has made,
the love that God has for each and everyone of us...
how life is an irony that the more awesome I feel about myself, I feel worst about myself.
We can't always get what we want, so we just make the most of what we can get.
The sun will always appear after a storm,
hope will never cease.
Lord willing, I can be better.
I miss AOF, having kids to cling on me,
I miss eating Roasted needle mushrooms with butter!
Do You Want to Build A Snowman - Kristen Bell / Katie Lopez / Agatha Lee Monn
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Random Ramblings
Ailey
Biley
Ciley
Diley
Eiley
Filey
Giley
Hiley
Jiley
Kiley
Liley
Miley
Niley
Oiley
Piley
Qiley
Riley
Siley
Tiley
Viley
Wiley
Xiley
Yiley
Ziley
Haha.... Guess which is my favourite?
Having little burst of energy in the middle of the night, something woke me up, not sure what is it, but at least I feel much better and hopeful now. God gave me the energy to move on and I thank you Lord.
Had been feeling kinda low lately, nothing seems to excite me, but am glad to feel a little of my 'strive till the end' momentum back, even if it's just the middle of the night. Been searching for things to occupy my time after work, yes, work. Sadly I became part of the working class, but am glad that I am working with great people. Just that life seems to lost it's momentum for a bit, as in, what can I do? And what do I look forward to everyday? It's funny that it's so easy to find things to look forward to while I was still a student and not when I really have time to do the things I want, like now. Had a sudden realization that I could do so much, and I just need to choose one to do at a time. =)
A drama got me thinking, what if my future self comes back and tell me to do things differently? Would I listen to her? Or proceed to doing things my way? Hmm.... Knowing the eccentric me, I would have gone my way no matter what. But it's the future me calling for help, it's me essentially and she saw that what I am bound to do won't lead to a good life, should I listen to her then? Hmm...
Another thing that kept me thinking was the person who was once your best friend, your sister, your ex, your parents, the person who is next to closest person to you, suddenly became strangers... How could such things happen? And what should we do to prevent this from happening? Cause it's like a nightmare in relationships, the thing most people fear most in their lives. Shouldn't we be paranoid about it and find ways and means to ensure that this won't happen?
A friend posted something like, my personality is what I am born with, and my attitude is towards who I am with. Sounds legit... Is it true? Hmm...
Dunno why, I suddenly felt a tinging feeling that I have lost touch with music... Hmm... I miss making music~ lalalla~~
Ok, guess it's enough ramblings for the night. Finally posted something after wanting to for the past few weeks. Nights folks~
2 Corinthians 6: 1-10
City of God (A beautiful song)
Biley
Ciley
Diley
Eiley
Filey
Giley
Hiley
Jiley
Kiley
Liley
Miley
Niley
Oiley
Piley
Qiley
Riley
Siley
Tiley
Viley
Wiley
Xiley
Yiley
Ziley
Haha.... Guess which is my favourite?
Having little burst of energy in the middle of the night, something woke me up, not sure what is it, but at least I feel much better and hopeful now. God gave me the energy to move on and I thank you Lord.
Had been feeling kinda low lately, nothing seems to excite me, but am glad to feel a little of my 'strive till the end' momentum back, even if it's just the middle of the night. Been searching for things to occupy my time after work, yes, work. Sadly I became part of the working class, but am glad that I am working with great people. Just that life seems to lost it's momentum for a bit, as in, what can I do? And what do I look forward to everyday? It's funny that it's so easy to find things to look forward to while I was still a student and not when I really have time to do the things I want, like now. Had a sudden realization that I could do so much, and I just need to choose one to do at a time. =)
A drama got me thinking, what if my future self comes back and tell me to do things differently? Would I listen to her? Or proceed to doing things my way? Hmm.... Knowing the eccentric me, I would have gone my way no matter what. But it's the future me calling for help, it's me essentially and she saw that what I am bound to do won't lead to a good life, should I listen to her then? Hmm...
Another thing that kept me thinking was the person who was once your best friend, your sister, your ex, your parents, the person who is next to closest person to you, suddenly became strangers... How could such things happen? And what should we do to prevent this from happening? Cause it's like a nightmare in relationships, the thing most people fear most in their lives. Shouldn't we be paranoid about it and find ways and means to ensure that this won't happen?
A friend posted something like, my personality is what I am born with, and my attitude is towards who I am with. Sounds legit... Is it true? Hmm...
Dunno why, I suddenly felt a tinging feeling that I have lost touch with music... Hmm... I miss making music~ lalalla~~
Ok, guess it's enough ramblings for the night. Finally posted something after wanting to for the past few weeks. Nights folks~
2 Corinthians 6: 1-10
As God’s co-workers we urge you not to receive God’s grace in vain. For he says,
“In the time of my favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.”
I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, now is the day of salvation.
We put no stumbling block in anyone’s path, so that our ministry will not be discredited. Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything.
City of God (A beautiful song)
Thursday, January 9, 2014
I Feel like My Heart is Gonna Burst
Sometimes when I listen to a song I really like,
really really like,
it makes me feel as though my heart is gonna burst.
I can't comprehend why, but it just feel awesome....
Makes me feel inspired to do the song,
to sing it out with all my heart and soul,
hoping that it sounds as beautiful as how I heard it.
It's just amazing,
that feeling.
I just want to be able to get people who can create beautiful melodies with me,
be it a band, orchestra or my own acapella group.
I just want to sing,
I just want to play,
with everything I have.
It's a new year again,
many things have changed.
I am no longer a student anymore.
Though it does not make much difference as I get to go to my uni everyday still,
but when I get home everyday,
it just feel, different.
I want to have assignments, rush for events, have practices, and just listen to lectures.
And I realized, all these won't happen anymore.
Things are different even if I take my Masters...
But one thing that is fortunate is that I get good colleagues.
My third day of my official job went by blissfully.
My colleagues are just so cute and welcoming.
Thank you Lord. =)
My uni life gave me so much that till now I still flip back to the past to relive some of the most wonderful moment in my life.
Also, I got to achieve things that I secretly wanted to do in my uni life.
Yeps, I played in a band,
an official band,
as a guitarist and a bassist.
Fulfilling the dreams of my previously amateur mind,
thinking that by knowing a few chords, I can play in a band.
Though it wasn't a perfect performance as I screwed up some parts,
it happened.
And I loved my oldies and miss them dearly.
Also, I got to be the vocals at KLPAC, even though I was just a harmonizer.
Something I really wanted to do after watching lead singers like Hayley Williams, Jung YongHwa, Demi Lovato play and sing, wowing everyone...
It just feels AMAZING...
I love the stage,
yep, I like to be on stage, A WHOLE LOT!
And God gave me a stage.
I am blessed.
I went to Philippines for a mission trip,
Organized camps accommodating around 600 campers,
Bought groceries amounted around 2k for aborigines,
Pulled off a stage play and a mini musical of singing and dancing,
Had an exhibition and production performance in a mall,
Learned how to design,
Shot pictures for official events,
Won colloquium, twice,
Played in a netball team,
Hiked 2 mountains,
Tutored maths to a secondary student...
Performed at two contemporary concerts,
went to my first artist concert in my life, JASON MRAZ,
1st MPO concert,
1st STOMP concert...
Life is just wonderful.
And I never regretted joining HELP.
Period.
Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
really really like,
it makes me feel as though my heart is gonna burst.
I can't comprehend why, but it just feel awesome....
Makes me feel inspired to do the song,
to sing it out with all my heart and soul,
hoping that it sounds as beautiful as how I heard it.
It's just amazing,
that feeling.
I just want to be able to get people who can create beautiful melodies with me,
be it a band, orchestra or my own acapella group.
I just want to sing,
I just want to play,
with everything I have.
It's a new year again,
many things have changed.
I am no longer a student anymore.
Though it does not make much difference as I get to go to my uni everyday still,
but when I get home everyday,
it just feel, different.
I want to have assignments, rush for events, have practices, and just listen to lectures.
And I realized, all these won't happen anymore.
Things are different even if I take my Masters...
But one thing that is fortunate is that I get good colleagues.
My third day of my official job went by blissfully.
My colleagues are just so cute and welcoming.
Thank you Lord. =)
My uni life gave me so much that till now I still flip back to the past to relive some of the most wonderful moment in my life.
Also, I got to achieve things that I secretly wanted to do in my uni life.
Yeps, I played in a band,
an official band,
as a guitarist and a bassist.
Fulfilling the dreams of my previously amateur mind,
thinking that by knowing a few chords, I can play in a band.
Though it wasn't a perfect performance as I screwed up some parts,
it happened.
And I loved my oldies and miss them dearly.
Also, I got to be the vocals at KLPAC, even though I was just a harmonizer.
Something I really wanted to do after watching lead singers like Hayley Williams, Jung YongHwa, Demi Lovato play and sing, wowing everyone...
It just feels AMAZING...
I love the stage,
yep, I like to be on stage, A WHOLE LOT!
And God gave me a stage.
I am blessed.
I went to Philippines for a mission trip,
Organized camps accommodating around 600 campers,
Bought groceries amounted around 2k for aborigines,
Pulled off a stage play and a mini musical of singing and dancing,
Had an exhibition and production performance in a mall,
Learned how to design,
Shot pictures for official events,
Won colloquium, twice,
Played in a netball team,
Hiked 2 mountains,
Tutored maths to a secondary student...
Performed at two contemporary concerts,
went to my first artist concert in my life, JASON MRAZ,
1st MPO concert,
1st STOMP concert...
This is a beautiful beautiful world.
Taken at Kibungan Mountain range.
Life is just wonderful.
And I never regretted joining HELP.
Period.
Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
It feels like everything is out to make me lose control
Each and everyday, I feel less of myself...
I know this sounds emo, but am trying to write as much as I can.
I want to get back into writing, journal the state I am so that as time passes, I know of a place to remember what happened in my lifetime.
Credits to this have to be given to the bad memory I have.
Every day I scroll through my social networks,
it is interesting to see what other people have done and accomplished.
But it only leaves me feeling small and intimidated.
Where am I now, what am I doing?
I used to be sure of everything that I do,
how I like things to be.
I still do now, but it is not as important
as it seems previously.
I don't really care about what will I work as, how will things work out.
I don't care what happens next.
Now there's this empty space inside, dying slowly I guess.
Is it because I'm nearing the finish line of my student life?
Crap, I don't even know if I can graduate now.
Heart constantly pounds heavily these days.
Yes, am feeling apprehensive...
I am not usually like that, even on the day of deadline, I don't experience such immense emotions when I am no where near done with my assignments...
But now, things are almost done,
I feel scared, disheartened... Lost.
There's so many things I want to do and I would like to do as always.
But what is different now is that I don't feel like doing any of them now.
And I know I will regret one day...
To be fair, I am living a really decent life,
I know of people who care about me (Or at least I would like to think so),
I get education,
No worries about food and lodging,
No constant fight or flight mode...
What a good life to have.
But I don't know...
Life feels hopeless right now.
As in even though I get to do the things I want,
there's nothing to look forward to.
Exams, Philippines, Christmas, Outings, Work, Cambodia, US...
Yet, I don't feel all that excited for them...
Have I reached the platonic state of life?
Anyway, lucky for me, yesterday and the day before I had dinner and lunch with two different groups who I have not expect to feel belonged and comfortable being with.
The deep discussions with COS group and the cheerful full-of-life conversations with the Sagittarius group brought me out of the platonic state I had been the past few days in that few hours.
Am also grateful to have sweet friends who remembers what you said to them and remembers how special some day means to me...
THANK YOU Lord.
"It's a long long Journey,
till I don't know where I'm supposed to be...
It's a long long Journey,
And I don't know if I can believe..."
- A song I think most people can relate to, nicely written and sung...
I know this sounds emo, but am trying to write as much as I can.
I want to get back into writing, journal the state I am so that as time passes, I know of a place to remember what happened in my lifetime.
Credits to this have to be given to the bad memory I have.
Every day I scroll through my social networks,
it is interesting to see what other people have done and accomplished.
But it only leaves me feeling small and intimidated.
Where am I now, what am I doing?
I used to be sure of everything that I do,
how I like things to be.
I still do now, but it is not as important
as it seems previously.
I don't really care about what will I work as, how will things work out.
I don't care what happens next.
Now there's this empty space inside, dying slowly I guess.
Is it because I'm nearing the finish line of my student life?
Crap, I don't even know if I can graduate now.
Heart constantly pounds heavily these days.
Yes, am feeling apprehensive...
I am not usually like that, even on the day of deadline, I don't experience such immense emotions when I am no where near done with my assignments...
But now, things are almost done,
I feel scared, disheartened... Lost.
There's so many things I want to do and I would like to do as always.
But what is different now is that I don't feel like doing any of them now.
And I know I will regret one day...
To be fair, I am living a really decent life,
I know of people who care about me (Or at least I would like to think so),
I get education,
No worries about food and lodging,
No constant fight or flight mode...
What a good life to have.
But I don't know...
Life feels hopeless right now.
As in even though I get to do the things I want,
there's nothing to look forward to.
Exams, Philippines, Christmas, Outings, Work, Cambodia, US...
Yet, I don't feel all that excited for them...
Have I reached the platonic state of life?
Anyway, lucky for me, yesterday and the day before I had dinner and lunch with two different groups who I have not expect to feel belonged and comfortable being with.
The deep discussions with COS group and the cheerful full-of-life conversations with the Sagittarius group brought me out of the platonic state I had been the past few days in that few hours.
Am also grateful to have sweet friends who remembers what you said to them and remembers how special some day means to me...
THANK YOU Lord.
"It's a long long Journey,
till I don't know where I'm supposed to be...
It's a long long Journey,
And I don't know if I can believe..."
- A song I think most people can relate to, nicely written and sung...
There's a stage,
there is light,
But there's no one there...
It's empty...
Is it still a stage?
Journey - Angela Zhang
Monday, December 2, 2013
Blessing in Disguise
Some times I wish that I have never entered the happy portrait...
Peeking through the stairwell silently, I've always wondered how good life is, if I have never entered their's.
But I was place into the picture, which is weird.
I have no choice but to stay, it's the only way'.
I believe God sends people to some places because it fits the puzzle...
Just like how some parents receive kids with special needs,
they get them because they themselves are special enough to take care of their child,
some one who will carry them through, making the best out of them.
But not everyone sees it that way...
If there's a misfit in life, I am quite sure that I'm the only misfit it in...
And it is only so that I feel like I don't belong in that place.
Perhaps its just a play of perceptions...
__________________________________________________________________
Anyway, here's a good news.
I have never actually won anything in my life which makes me proud.
So this will be the first time...
Got Best Presenter for my research category in the last colloquium of my uni life! haha..
I am really happy because it is the last thing on earth that I expect to happen.
The minute Ms Winnee announced my name, I was stunned. haha...
THANK YOU MS. JOCELYN for considering me even though I felt that I screwed up.
I am so happy! Here's what I got.
Peeking through the stairwell silently, I've always wondered how good life is, if I have never entered their's.
But I was place into the picture, which is weird.
I have no choice but to stay, it's the only way'.
I believe God sends people to some places because it fits the puzzle...
Just like how some parents receive kids with special needs,
they get them because they themselves are special enough to take care of their child,
some one who will carry them through, making the best out of them.
But not everyone sees it that way...
If there's a misfit in life, I am quite sure that I'm the only misfit it in...
And it is only so that I feel like I don't belong in that place.
Perhaps its just a play of perceptions...
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Anyway, here's a good news.
I have never actually won anything in my life which makes me proud.
So this will be the first time...
Got Best Presenter for my research category in the last colloquium of my uni life! haha..
I am really happy because it is the last thing on earth that I expect to happen.
The minute Ms Winnee announced my name, I was stunned. haha...
THANK YOU MS. JOCELYN for considering me even though I felt that I screwed up.
I am so happy! Here's what I got.
I'm a happy gal!!! ^^
It's a blessing in disguise I guess.
I couldn't sleep the night before as I haven't finished preparing my whole presentation.
And minutes before my presentation, I was still changing my slides.
Really can't believe it happened, THANK YOU GOD! ^^
My last colloquium in HELP,
the day of uni... (Before finals),
and it's by default a special day for me.
I am blessed....
Although it didn't went as I would love it to be,
I learned a valuable lesson that day.
I guess it covers the whole unpleasantness of the whole day.
My baby's name: A Stranger in Others' Eyes: Subjective Experiences of Foreign Workers
Beneath Your Beautiful - Labyrinth
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